It’s a fantasy, love

It’s been over three years since I dropped an L-bomb. I don’t know if that’s a long time or not – and how does one measure that anyway? – but that’s how long it’s been. And in all my years, I’ve only said that word to three men. The operative word being “said.” I’ve loved…

a happy life

Sometimes he sneaks up on me. His memory greets me like a gentle shoulder tap or a whisper in my ear. Maybe it’s the sound of his laugh or the way he called me “darlin’.” I feel him wash over me. It’s warm…and melancholy. We were never exactly a couple, but we were certainly tied…

If a bear shits in the woods…

A couple of months ago, I was out to dinner with two of my guy friends.  We were at a little Italian restaurant in the Hamptons where the tables were dressed with white butcher paper over-top white table cloths.  One of my friends pulled out a pen and began asking us questions that were supposed to…

Listen. The Answers Are Always There.

A couple of years ago I had an unusual spiritual experience in Port Jefferson, NY.  In the span of about twenty minutes, two different shop keepers said the same exact phrase to me: “Follow your instincts. Your instincts are right.” These comments were really out of context, which made the message even louder. Friends of mine…

Owning Up and Moving On

Confession: Most of the heartache I’ve experienced has been made worse by my own doings. A few years back, I was entangled in a quasi-relationship-thing with someone. I couldn’t seem to understand why things fell apart and at the time I didn’t have the emotional maturity to deal with not having a tidy reason.  So,…